Anorexia: A Poem

NICOLLE [13]

ANOREXIA

I hear you

I know it’s you

When you came into my life

I wanted you there

You made me feel good

I felt strong

But I was really weak

You tore apart so many relationships

And hurt so many people

Especially me

Yet I still want you there

Part of me clings to you

Like the shoulder of a friend

Who gives support

But you have to leave

I’m going to make you

If you stay

I know you’ll kill me

So I hate you

You ruined my life

And made me love it

Now I don’t know if I can trust myself

It’s your fault

But I can still hear your voice

Sometimes it sounds so reasonable

That I want to listen

It’s hard not to listen

To get rid of you

It seems so impossible

I don’t know if I ever will

Maybe I’ll always hear you

But that doesn’t mean I have to listen

Someday you won’t be a problem

You’ll go away

I’ll be normal

And I’ll be free

From your restrictions and rules

AND MOST OF ALL, PUNISHMENTS

Someday I’ll be free

There’s a separation between you and me

A fine line

That now I can see