Apology From Anorexia To Myself

DAVID(AGED 12)

I AM WRITING THIS APOLOGY TO MYSELF BECAUSE I KNOW THAT EVEN THOUGH I MAY DREAM ABOUT IT, EVEN THOUGH I THOROUGHLY DESERVE IT, EVEN THOUGH YOU HAVE STOLEN EVERY PLEASURE THAT I HAD IN MY LIFE. I KNOW THAT YOU ARE SO HEARTLESS, SO SHALLOW AND SO RUTHLESS THAT YOU WOULD NEVER HAVE THE COMPASSION OR DECENCY TO EVER MAKE THE APOLOGY THAT YOU HAVE FOR SUCH A LONG TIME OWED ME.

HERE IT IS:

I AM SORRY THAT I HAVE STOLEN YOUR LIFE AWAY FROM YOU. I AM SORRY FOR TURNING EVERY PLEASURE YOU ONCE HAD IN YOUR JOYFUL LIFE INTO AN UNBEARABLE TORTURE. FROM YOUR PLEASURE IN EATING TO YOUR PLEASURE IN GOOD COMPANY AND SPORT. I MADE YOU HATE YOURSELF AND SEE FAULT IN EVERYTHING THAT YOU WERE AND DID. I TOOK AWAY ALL YOUR HAPPINESS AND TURNED EVERYTHING YOU FOUND INTO A HORRIBLE ORDEAL. I SAPPED AWAY ALL YOUR ENERGY AND STRENGTH., TURNING YOU INTO A LIFELESS BODY WITHOUT A SOUL. I DEPRIVED YOU OF ALL THE TASTES YOU ENJOYED AND STOLE FROM YOU X KGS, TURNING YOU INTO AN UNHAPPY SKELETON. I LIED TO YOU, TELLING YOU THAT I WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY AND OVERALL A BETTER PERSON THAN YOU WERE BEFORE. WHEN YOU DID WHAT I SAID, I WAS RUTHLESS AND PUSHED YOUR FACE INTO THE MUD, MAKING YOU HATE YOURSELF AND BLAME YOURSELF FOR THINGS THAT I HAD FORCED AND TORTURED YOU INTO DOING.

WHEN YOU LOOK AT ALL THE THINGS IN THE NEVER-ENDING LIST OF THINGS I HAVE DONE TO YOU, IT IS OBVIOUS THAT IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE TO FIX WHAT I HAVE DONE. THERE IS NO WAY THAT I CAN TAKE BACK WHAT I HAVE DONE BECAUSE I HAVE TERRIBLY SCARRED AND MUTILATED YOU. ALL I CAN DO IS APOLOGIZE AND LEAVE YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ALONE FOREVER. I KNOW I CANNOT MAKE UP FOR WHAT I HAVE TO DONE TO YOU BUT I WILL DO ALL I CAN TO FIX WHAT I HAVE DONE. I AM SORRY FOR WHAT I HAVE DONE AND YOU DESERVE THIS APOLOGY AND MORE.

YOURS TRULY SORRY,

ANOREXIA.